Day Fifty One

Feeling a little bit low today, not looking forward to chemo tomorrow. Also, hair loss is getting me down a bit. People's reactions have generally been good, but I don't feel like me anymore. If I wear my spare hair, I am very conscious of it. I walked into town today and the paranoia hit me - are people looking at me because it is obvious I am wearing a wig? Friends reassure me that it does look natural, but I don't like wearing it and I am not brave enough to go out looking bald. Listen to me, worrying about my hair when I have other things to worry about! But that's the thing, I am not worrying about that, just getting on with it. So perhaps I should listen to my own advice and just get on with it. I have asked my little person's school for some help - see, I can ask for help! I will need help over the next few weeks as my chemo progresses to get my little person to school. They sent home a letter yesterday to parents who live close to me, and today, three mums phoned me and offered their assistance. People are wonderful. I could not do this without people like that and my friends and family. Well, I shall do my best to be with you tomorrow, I am being zapped at 8.30am, I may be asleep all day, but I know you are thinking of me.