Day Seventy Nine

Really feeling fab today, good music on the stereo, smiled all the way into work - hope I make people wonder what I am grinning about! Have so much to smile for, as people are finding out about this I am getting so many messages of support, it's very hard to get down about things. I feel so alive! The only thing I am sad about is that my boss has said he is moving onto pastures new - he has been more than a boss to me over the last few years, he has been an incredible support to me in so many different things in my life, the most recent obviously being my illness and my divorce. He is such a good friend, I know I am going to miss him terribly. BUT! We must do what is right for us, no matter how hard the decision is.

I have just had a phone call from my oncologist - my blood results are improving! In his words, if I am feeling well, that is a good sign. He says that patients are the best indicators of what is going on, blood results are just an indicator. He is going to book me in for my MRI but I will probably have my next round of chemo first. I am too scared to uncross my fingers. I think the pain in my right side may be muscular, it seems to be over my ribs. Logic says if I am feeling fabulous, I must be getting better. The problem is, I never felt unwell in the first place. I am not going to be able to relax until I have had the scan done, but if I tick things off, my breast is looking better, I am not having 'toilet' problems which I started to have, my last period was more like how I used to be, the lump certainly appears to be getting smaller and most importantly, my health is not deteriorating, it SOUNDS as if I am responding to treatment. Fingers crossed.