Day 54

Feeling a little better today, slept for ten hours last night but still went back to bed this morning and then fell asleep on the sofa this afternoon. I had fatigue last time with the chemo but not on this scale, I really feel that I could sleep around the clock quite cheerfully. Do you remember me telling you that my nails hurt on my first and second fingers of both hands - the pain has now gone but I noticed today I have now got purple moons on my nails, I can now see in my nails when I started chemo and the difference in the colour before and after. The dull ache in my side has virtually gone now, I get the odd twinge now and then but its not even a twinge, more like a low rumble. The difference in my attitude this time with having chemo is probably the biggest difference. Last time I was still trying to get into work every day, I know I pushed myself way to hard, even my boss said I was overdoing it. I took my body for granted. This time I am listening to my body and I am doing what I used to do when I was a child. If I was ever feeling poorly I used to take myself off to bed and sleep. Sleep is my healer. Ok, this is me admitting to myself - I am about as poorly now as I can be. So I need as much sleep as I can get. And I must stop beating myself up about it. I can stop sleeping when I am better.